Coffee Quotes

Coffee is the best thing to douse the sunrise with.-Drew Sirtors


Men should be like coffee, hot sweet and strong.-Dutch Proverb


Coffee should be black as Hell, strong as death, and sweet as love.-Turkish Proverb


Coffee and tobacco are complete repose.-Turkish Proverb


No one can understand the truth until he drinks of coffee’s frothy goodness.-Sheik Abd-al-Kadir


Coffee has two virtues: it is wet and warm.-Dutch Proverb


A morning without coffee is like sleep.-Anonymous


Coffee, the finest organic suspension ever devised.-Voyager


I believe humans get a lot done, not because we’re smart, but because we have thumbs so we can make coffee.-Flash Rosenberg


The morning cup of coffee has an exhilaration about it which the cheering influence of the afternoon or evening cup of tea cannot be expected to reproduce.-Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.


Mothers are those wonderful people who can get up in the morning before the smell of coffee.-Anonymous


Sleep is a symptom of caffeine deprivation.-Anonymous


No coffee can be good in the mouth that does not first send a sweet offering of odor to the nostrils.-Henry Ward Beecher


Coffee, which makes the politicians wise,
And see through all things with his half-shut eyes.-Alexander Pope


As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.-Anonymous


Coffee smells like freshly ground heaven.-Jessi Lane Adams


I like my coffee like I like my women. In a plastic cup.-Eddie Izzard


Decaffeinated coffee is the devil’s blend.-Anonymous


The ability to deal with people is as purchasable a commodity as sugar or coffee and I will pay more for that ability than for any other under the sun.-John D. Rockefeller


I like my coffee like my women: hot, strong, steamy.-Anonymous


I like my coffee strong and my women weak.-Alexander Pappas


Coffee is good for talent, but genius wants prayer.-Ralph Waldo Emerson


Coffee is a beverage that puts one to sleep when not drank.-Alphonse Allais


Decaffeinated coffee is kind of like kissing your sister.-Bob Irwin


Sleep is just a symptom of caffeine lack.-Herman Friele


Way too much coffee. But if it weren’t for the coffee, I’d have no identifiable personality whatsoever.-David Letterman


I had some dreams, they were clouds in my coffee.-Carly Simon


Coffee: Black as the devil, Hot as hell, Pure as an angel, Sweet as love.-Charles Maurice de Talleyrand-Perigord


Petroleum and coffee had no value a few centuries ago.-Anonymous


Coffee and love are best when they are hot.-German Proverb


Behind every successful woman is a substantial amount of coffee.-Stephanie Piro


I bought a decaffeinated coffee table, you can’t even see a difference.-Anonymous


Did you ever have the feeling that the world was an AC coffee pot and you were DC?-Alan Dean Foster


A cup of coffee shared with a friend is happiness tasted and time well spent.-Anonymous


I orchestrate my mornings to the tune of coffee.-Harry Mahtar


Caffeine isn’t a drug, it’s a vitamin!-Anonymous


Man does not live by coffee alone. Have a danish.-Anonymous


Conscience keeps more people awake than coffee.-Anonymous


Retirement is one great big giant coffee break.-Anonymous


I could smell myself awake with that coffee.-Jaesse Tyler


A girl in a bikini is like having a loaded pistol on your coffee table - There’s nothing wrong with them, but it’s hard to stop thinking about it.-Garrison Keillor


COFFEE.SYS Not Found: User startup disabled.-Anonymous


I never drink coffee at lunch. I find it keeps me awake for the afternoon.-Ronald Reagan


Remember, even if you don’t love coffee, coffee loves you.-lex Gottschalk


Oh, well .. the coffee’s only ever as good as the water it is made with. And the froth on top is the frilly knicker on a cheap tart’s bum.-Ian Anderson


This coffee tastes like mud! Well, it was ground this morning.-Anonymous


Don’t drink coffee in the morning. It will keep you awake until noon.-Anonymous


Cocaine is like really evil coffee.-Courtney Love


The first cup is for the guest, the second for enjoyment, the third for the sword.-Arabic saying


Television is not real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.-Bill Gates


You know you’ve been playing too much Nethack when you refer to coffee as a potion of sleep resistance.-Sweeney Todd Lundgren


Be a coffee-drinking individual - espresso yourself!-Anonymous


If I asked for a cup of coffee, someone would search for the double meaning.-Mae West


If it wasn’t for coffee, I’d have no discernible personality at all.-David Letterman


Coffee in England is just toasted milk.-Anonymous


Cafe society is as old as the hills. Starbucks and its imitators are the coffee face of the new man in a hurry.-Ian Anderson


Decaf? No, it’s dangerous to dilute my caffeine stream.-Anonymous


In Seattle you haven’t had enough coffee until you can thread a sewing machine while it’s running.-Jeff Bezos


I like my coffee strong, not lethal!-Mash


Ah! How sweet coffee tastes! Lovelier than a thousand kisses, sweeter far than muscatel wine! -”Coffee Cantata”.-J.S. Bach


Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat.-Alex Levine


Well, they’re Southern people, and if they know you are working at home they think nothing of walking right in for coffee. But they wouldn’t dream of interrupting you at golf.-Harper Lee


One more cup of coffee before I go to the valley below…-Bob Dylon


Cigarettes and coffee: an alcoholic’s best friend!-Gerard Way


Coffee makes us severe, and grave, and philosophical.-Jonathan Swift


Coffee: The first peripheral!-Anonymous


Coffee? No thanks, one more cup & *I’ll* jump to warp.-Captain Janeway


A flying saucer results when a nudist spills his coffee.-Anonymous


Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?-Stephen Wright


I would rather suffer with coffee than be senseless.-Napoleon Bonaparte


Coffee, n. break fluid.-Anonymous


A leaf fluttered in through the window this morning, as if supported by the rays of the sun, a bird settled on the fire escape, joy in the task of coffee, joy accompanied me as I walked…-Anais Nin


Bring me A bowl of coffee before I turn into a goat.-Johann Sebastian Bach


Decaffeinated Coffee. It’s useless warm brown water.-Heard on David Letterman


I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time.-Stephen Wright


I’d stop drinking coffee, but I’m no quitter.-Anonymous


Our culture runs on coffee and gasoline, the first often tasting like the second.-Edward Abbey


I never laugh until I’ve had my coffee.-Clark Gable


A mathematician is a machine for turning coffee into theorems.-Paul Erdos


I don’t want anything better, I want coffee.-Captain Janeway


I don’t have a problem with caffeine. I have a problem without caffeine!-Anonymous


Its amazing how the World begins to change through the eyes of a cup of coffee!!-Donna A. Favors


All the coffee in Columbia won’t make me a morning person.-Anonymous


Dinsdale, He was a nice boy…. He nailed my head to a coffee table.-Monty Python


Why don’t you have a cup of coffee at least? I, um, I’m a little low in sugar and I don’t have any cream, but it’s real coffee.-Barbara Streisand


I’ll quit coffee. It won’t be easy drinking my Bailey’s straight, but I’ll get used to it. It’ll still be the best part of waking up.-Will and Grace


My blood type is Folgers.-Anonymous


Espresso is to Italy, what champagne is to France.-Charles Maurice de Talleyrand


I think if I were a woman I’d wear coffee as a perfume.-John Van Druten


For I have known them all already, know them all — have known the evenings, mornings, afternoons, I have measured out my life with coffee spoons.-T.S. Eliot


Science may never come up with a better office communication system than the coffee break.-Earl Wilson


He was my cream, and I was his coffee
And when you poured us together, it was something.-Josephine Baker


Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling.-Dave Barry


If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee.”-Abraham Lincoln


Deja Brew: The feeling that you’ve had this coffee before.-Anonymous


The use of (coffee) will probably become greatly extended — as in other countries, it may diffuse itself among the mass of the people, and make a considerable ingredient in their daily sustenance.”-Benjamin Moseley


I hope some day to make you all a cup of coffee. Alright, peace.-Johnny Depp


I have measured out my life with coffee spoons.-T.S. Eliot


When traveling with someone, take large doses of patience and tolerance with your morning coffee.-Helen Hayes


Coffee is a fleeting moment and a fragrance.-Claudia Roden


Tis pity wine should be so deleterious, for tea and coffee leave us much more serious.-Lord Byron


A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.-Paul Erdos


We usually don’t notice until the coffee tastes funny.-Anne Afdahl


Black coffee must be strong and very hot; if strong coffee does not agree with you, do not drink black coffee. And if you do not drink black coffee, do not drink any coffee at all.”-Andre Simon


Good communication is just as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after.-Anne Morrow Lindbergh


Over second and third cups flow matters of high finance, high state, common gossip and low comedy. Coffee is a social binder, a warmer of tongues, a soberer of minds, a stimulant of wit, a foiler of sleep if you want it so. From roadside mugs to the classic demi-tasse, it is the perfect democrat.-Anonymous


This coffee falls into your stomach, and straightway there is a general commotion. Ideas begin to move like the battalions of the Grand Army of the battlefield, and the battle takes place. Things remembered arrive at full gallop, ensuing to the wind. The light cavalry of comparisons deliver a magnificent deploying charge, the artillery of logic hurry up with their train and ammunition, the shafts of with start up like sharpshooters. Similes arise, the paper is covered with ink; for the struggle commences and is concluded with torrents of black water, just as a battle with powder.-Honore de Balzac


See how special you are? I serve you coffee in the parlor.-Anthony Quinn


Ultimate office automation - networked coffee machines.-Anonymous


Like everyone else who makes the mistake of getting older, I begin each day with coffee and obituaries.-Bill Cosby


Do I like my coffee black? There are other colors?-Anonymous


Don’t laugh at the coffee. Some day you, too, may be old and weak.-Anonymous


Docs? Oh, you mean the stuff you wipe up coffee with?-Anonymous


I make serious coffee - so strong it wakes up the neighbors.-Anonymous


Coffee leads men to trifle away their time, scald their chops, and spend their money, all for a little base, black, thick, nasty, bitter, stinking nauseous puddle water.-The Women’s Petition Against Coffee


C:\COFFEE.POT missing A: Abort R: Retry F: Fall asleep?-Anonymous


Chocolate, men, coffee - some things are better rich.-Anonymous


I’ve just arrived in New York City. What a place! Just smell those skyscrapers. Had breakfast at a little deli on Ninth Avenue. Cheese Danish and a cup of coffee, black as a moonless night.-David Lynch


A fig for partridges and quails,
ye dainties I know nothing of ye;
But on the highest mount in Wales
Would choose in peace to drink my coffee.-Jonathon Swift


Everybody should believe in something. I believe I’ll have another coffee.-Anonymous

Last modified 07-Sep-2011 8:15 AM